The Permanence of Marriage - Mark 10:1-12
The Permanence of Marriage - Mark 10:1-12
By Pastor Lee Hemen
August 1, 2010 AM
There is nothing permanent in life and folks would do well to remember this plain and simple truth. However there are relationships that are to last. Our relationship with Jesus lasts forever and our marriage relationship is one that is to last a lifetime. For many years when people claimed that the divorce rate in Christian circles was just the same as the world, it was accepted as a hard but true fact. But if we dig deeper into the facts, we find something quite different. For instance, when you take into consideration couples that were married and mentored within strong theologically conservative churches, the number of divorces compared to the world, drops dramatically. Folks who came to Christ after their marriage have a greater opportunity of developing a strong lifetime marital relationship. Counselors have found that if the husband leads in the relationship and determines that the couple’s marriage is to be founded on Christ, the marriage has a very strong chance of success.
Why then, do we hear so many negative things about marriage? We have all experienced someone we know getting a divorce. It is a sad but unacceptable fact of life today. We have to revive the spiritual truth of how God views marriage before we decide to make our commitment to one another as husband and wife. Some incorrectly think that if they live together first, this will solve the problem. In fact, it makes a marriage worse. Marriage isn’t the problem; the problem is that we do not teach God’s view of marriage. Self-centered humans think that marriage is all about them. It is not. Jesus, here in Mark’s gospel, teaches us about the permanence of marriage. Let’s see what he has to say…
READ: Mark 10:1-12
We find here in Mark’s gospel that marriage is to be permanent because…
I. Marriage is God’s gift to mankind! (Vv. 1-9)
1. Marriage is the reflection of God’s love and grace! We find Jesus is in Judea headed across the Jordan River. Crowds form and Pharisees show up. These deceitful men test Jesus by asking him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” They are not looking for the truth, but want a self-incriminating answer. All Pharisees agreed that the law permitted divorce, but they disagreed on the grounds for divorce. Some allowed divorce only if a wife were guilty of immorality; while others allowed a husband to divorce his wife for almost any reason. How does Jesus respond? He tells them, “It was because YOUR hearts were hard that Moses wrote YOU this law.” Wow! You have to understand what Jesus is saying. Marriage was the reflection of God's grace extended toward sinful man. Everything God had created was “good,” but after making Adam, he realized “It is not good for the man to be alone.” And God determined to “make a helper suitable for him.” (Genesis 2:18) After making all kinds of animals for Adam to name and become acquainted with we quickly learn, “But for Adam no suitable helper was found.” (Genesis 2:20) He needed something far more special than an antelope or zebra. “So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.” (Genesis 2:21-22) The woman became for Adam “bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh,” and in this, we discover just how much God loved his ultimate creation. God realized man’s loneliness and emptiness and specially created from him and for him a helpmate. A wonderful expression of God’s grace and love. This is why homosexuality is such an abomination to God. It perverts his love and grace. Also, this is why God hates divorce. God made the imperfect law, a certificate of divorce, for imperfect mankind. Jesus tells them, “at the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female” but “because YOUR hearts were hard that Moses wrote YOU this law!” Just as God took Eve from Adam’s flesh, marriage makes a man and wife “one flesh” again sexually, emotionally, and spiritually. Jesus concludes by telling them, “Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” Marriage is God’s gift to mankind!
EXAMPLE: Do you realize that when a father gives his daughter to be married, it represents the giving of his greatest treasure. It represents God giving us Jesus and the redeemed thereby becoming his bride. Believers, as the Church, are called the “bride of Christ.” Marriage should never be seen as a means to reconcile two households, to gain prominence in a community, nor as a means of escape. When couples live together outside of the bonds of marriage, they think they have circumnavigated the ills of divorce or the shackles of responsibility. Nothing could be further from the truth. We find that those who live together first and then get married are more than likely to divorce within the first three years. Why? When living together there is no commitment, nothing holding an individual to the other person. Marriage is a giving, a contractual agreement, just as faith in Christ is. It is two parties coming together under the grace of God and pledging themselves to one another for life – but more importantly to one another and to the Lord. Marriage is always a three-way contract between one man, one woman, and the Lord. Marriage is God’s gift to mankind!
We also discover in Jesus’ words here in Mark, that marriage is to be permanent because…
II. Our humanity is so imperfect! (Vv. 10-12)
1. Marriage is the next best thing to heaven on earth! While there is no “perfect” marriage, I honestly believe that when done right, this statement is perfectly true. When they were alone, the disciples evidently had a hard time with what Jesus said concerning divorce. They “asked Jesus about this.” His answer is interesting because he immediately goes to the heart of their true inquiry. They were wondering about when was it then okay to divorce one’s wife! Jesus puts a screeching halt to the disciple’s speculation by stating, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.” However, he does not stop there, he continues by saying, “And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.” Why would he be so quick and so strict in his response? Jesus understood that people are sinful in nature. God gave Moses a means for divorce neither to excuse it nor to give it as an option, but because he knew, the Israelites were sinful! Again, marriage is not just about us. God views it as a sacred contract. Paul helps us understand this when he writes, after telling husbands to “love your wives” and “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord,” by saying, “This is a profound mystery--but I am talking about Christ and the church.” (Ephesians 5:32) God views marriage as sacred as he does the body of Christ, his church! Wow! We discover that the marriage relation represents the union between God and his people. God told Isaiah, “For your Maker is your husband-- the LORD Almighty is his name-- the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth.” (Isaiah 54:5) and, we find in Revelation 19:7-8 that the Church is seen as Jesus’ “bride” and that a beautiful “wedding” occurs when Christians are finally joined in union with him by faith! Paul fully understood this and wrote the Corinthian Church, “I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him.” (2 Corinthians 11:2) Marriage is to be a lifelong commitment that God has given us while we are here on earth. Jesus would teach, “At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.” (Matthew 22:30) He is not saying our marriages now will be null and void in heaven, what Jesus is saying is that there will be no need for people to marry in heaven. Our marriages now will become a beautiful new relationship in heaven and those who have not married will find a more complete relationship there. Heaven is not the extension of the pleasures we find here on earth, but marriage is sacred relationship established by God because our humanity is so imperfect!
EXAMPLE: Marriage is such a sacred thing that when we do anything to disrupt it, it is seen as an abomination to the Lord. It is more than a fifty-fifty split of household items. It often requires placing oneself last. It is more than compromise; it is loving one another above and beyond your personal needs. Selfishness in marriage never works. Instead, we are to seek ways to complement one another and encourage each other in marriage. When God looked down at Adam, he realized that he was incomplete by himself. He needed someone more than himself, creatures, or even a relationship with God alone. Now isn’t that interesting. God knew it was not good for man to be alone, even though he was never actually “alone” without God. Yet, the Lord understood that humans are so imperfect when left to themselves. Humans need companionship that is physical, emotional, and reachable. I guess that’s why I like the old Gershwin tune, Somebody to Watch Over Me. It goes something like this, “There's a somebody I’m longing to see, I hope that she turns out to be someone who will watch over me. I’m a little lamb who’s lost in the wood I know I could always be good, with someone who will watch over me.” Perhaps that’s why God gave us marriage; he knew our humanity is so imperfect.
Conclusion:
Today we learned two beautiful truths concerning marriage from Jesus’ teaching in Mark’s gospel: 1) Marriage is permanent because marriage is God’s gift to mankind, and 2) marriage is permanent because God knew our humanity is so imperfect!
—
Pastor Lee Hemen has been the outspoken pastor of the same church for 25 years in Vancouver, WA. He writes regularly on spirituality and conservative causes and maintains several web blogs. This article is copyrighted © 2010 by Lee Hemen and is the sole property of Lee Hemen, and may not be used unless you quote the entire article and have my permission. You now have my permission…
By Pastor Lee Hemen
August 1, 2010 AM
There is nothing permanent in life and folks would do well to remember this plain and simple truth. However there are relationships that are to last. Our relationship with Jesus lasts forever and our marriage relationship is one that is to last a lifetime. For many years when people claimed that the divorce rate in Christian circles was just the same as the world, it was accepted as a hard but true fact. But if we dig deeper into the facts, we find something quite different. For instance, when you take into consideration couples that were married and mentored within strong theologically conservative churches, the number of divorces compared to the world, drops dramatically. Folks who came to Christ after their marriage have a greater opportunity of developing a strong lifetime marital relationship. Counselors have found that if the husband leads in the relationship and determines that the couple’s marriage is to be founded on Christ, the marriage has a very strong chance of success.
Why then, do we hear so many negative things about marriage? We have all experienced someone we know getting a divorce. It is a sad but unacceptable fact of life today. We have to revive the spiritual truth of how God views marriage before we decide to make our commitment to one another as husband and wife. Some incorrectly think that if they live together first, this will solve the problem. In fact, it makes a marriage worse. Marriage isn’t the problem; the problem is that we do not teach God’s view of marriage. Self-centered humans think that marriage is all about them. It is not. Jesus, here in Mark’s gospel, teaches us about the permanence of marriage. Let’s see what he has to say…
READ: Mark 10:1-12
We find here in Mark’s gospel that marriage is to be permanent because…
I. Marriage is God’s gift to mankind! (Vv. 1-9)
1. Marriage is the reflection of God’s love and grace! We find Jesus is in Judea headed across the Jordan River. Crowds form and Pharisees show up. These deceitful men test Jesus by asking him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” They are not looking for the truth, but want a self-incriminating answer. All Pharisees agreed that the law permitted divorce, but they disagreed on the grounds for divorce. Some allowed divorce only if a wife were guilty of immorality; while others allowed a husband to divorce his wife for almost any reason. How does Jesus respond? He tells them, “It was because YOUR hearts were hard that Moses wrote YOU this law.” Wow! You have to understand what Jesus is saying. Marriage was the reflection of God's grace extended toward sinful man. Everything God had created was “good,” but after making Adam, he realized “It is not good for the man to be alone.” And God determined to “make a helper suitable for him.” (Genesis 2:18) After making all kinds of animals for Adam to name and become acquainted with we quickly learn, “But for Adam no suitable helper was found.” (Genesis 2:20) He needed something far more special than an antelope or zebra. “So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.” (Genesis 2:21-22) The woman became for Adam “bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh,” and in this, we discover just how much God loved his ultimate creation. God realized man’s loneliness and emptiness and specially created from him and for him a helpmate. A wonderful expression of God’s grace and love. This is why homosexuality is such an abomination to God. It perverts his love and grace. Also, this is why God hates divorce. God made the imperfect law, a certificate of divorce, for imperfect mankind. Jesus tells them, “at the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female” but “because YOUR hearts were hard that Moses wrote YOU this law!” Just as God took Eve from Adam’s flesh, marriage makes a man and wife “one flesh” again sexually, emotionally, and spiritually. Jesus concludes by telling them, “Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” Marriage is God’s gift to mankind!
EXAMPLE: Do you realize that when a father gives his daughter to be married, it represents the giving of his greatest treasure. It represents God giving us Jesus and the redeemed thereby becoming his bride. Believers, as the Church, are called the “bride of Christ.” Marriage should never be seen as a means to reconcile two households, to gain prominence in a community, nor as a means of escape. When couples live together outside of the bonds of marriage, they think they have circumnavigated the ills of divorce or the shackles of responsibility. Nothing could be further from the truth. We find that those who live together first and then get married are more than likely to divorce within the first three years. Why? When living together there is no commitment, nothing holding an individual to the other person. Marriage is a giving, a contractual agreement, just as faith in Christ is. It is two parties coming together under the grace of God and pledging themselves to one another for life – but more importantly to one another and to the Lord. Marriage is always a three-way contract between one man, one woman, and the Lord. Marriage is God’s gift to mankind!
We also discover in Jesus’ words here in Mark, that marriage is to be permanent because…
II. Our humanity is so imperfect! (Vv. 10-12)
1. Marriage is the next best thing to heaven on earth! While there is no “perfect” marriage, I honestly believe that when done right, this statement is perfectly true. When they were alone, the disciples evidently had a hard time with what Jesus said concerning divorce. They “asked Jesus about this.” His answer is interesting because he immediately goes to the heart of their true inquiry. They were wondering about when was it then okay to divorce one’s wife! Jesus puts a screeching halt to the disciple’s speculation by stating, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.” However, he does not stop there, he continues by saying, “And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.” Why would he be so quick and so strict in his response? Jesus understood that people are sinful in nature. God gave Moses a means for divorce neither to excuse it nor to give it as an option, but because he knew, the Israelites were sinful! Again, marriage is not just about us. God views it as a sacred contract. Paul helps us understand this when he writes, after telling husbands to “love your wives” and “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord,” by saying, “This is a profound mystery--but I am talking about Christ and the church.” (Ephesians 5:32) God views marriage as sacred as he does the body of Christ, his church! Wow! We discover that the marriage relation represents the union between God and his people. God told Isaiah, “For your Maker is your husband-- the LORD Almighty is his name-- the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth.” (Isaiah 54:5) and, we find in Revelation 19:7-8 that the Church is seen as Jesus’ “bride” and that a beautiful “wedding” occurs when Christians are finally joined in union with him by faith! Paul fully understood this and wrote the Corinthian Church, “I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him.” (2 Corinthians 11:2) Marriage is to be a lifelong commitment that God has given us while we are here on earth. Jesus would teach, “At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.” (Matthew 22:30) He is not saying our marriages now will be null and void in heaven, what Jesus is saying is that there will be no need for people to marry in heaven. Our marriages now will become a beautiful new relationship in heaven and those who have not married will find a more complete relationship there. Heaven is not the extension of the pleasures we find here on earth, but marriage is sacred relationship established by God because our humanity is so imperfect!
EXAMPLE: Marriage is such a sacred thing that when we do anything to disrupt it, it is seen as an abomination to the Lord. It is more than a fifty-fifty split of household items. It often requires placing oneself last. It is more than compromise; it is loving one another above and beyond your personal needs. Selfishness in marriage never works. Instead, we are to seek ways to complement one another and encourage each other in marriage. When God looked down at Adam, he realized that he was incomplete by himself. He needed someone more than himself, creatures, or even a relationship with God alone. Now isn’t that interesting. God knew it was not good for man to be alone, even though he was never actually “alone” without God. Yet, the Lord understood that humans are so imperfect when left to themselves. Humans need companionship that is physical, emotional, and reachable. I guess that’s why I like the old Gershwin tune, Somebody to Watch Over Me. It goes something like this, “There's a somebody I’m longing to see, I hope that she turns out to be someone who will watch over me. I’m a little lamb who’s lost in the wood I know I could always be good, with someone who will watch over me.” Perhaps that’s why God gave us marriage; he knew our humanity is so imperfect.
Conclusion:
Today we learned two beautiful truths concerning marriage from Jesus’ teaching in Mark’s gospel: 1) Marriage is permanent because marriage is God’s gift to mankind, and 2) marriage is permanent because God knew our humanity is so imperfect!
—
Pastor Lee Hemen has been the outspoken pastor of the same church for 25 years in Vancouver, WA. He writes regularly on spirituality and conservative causes and maintains several web blogs. This article is copyrighted © 2010 by Lee Hemen and is the sole property of Lee Hemen, and may not be used unless you quote the entire article and have my permission. You now have my permission…
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